Both my roommates talk in their sleep, and since they almost always sleep earlier than I do, I get to hear both of them babble some nights o.o
tourist: could you give us directions to Olive Garden?
new yorker: no, but i could give you directions to an actual Italian restaurant lol
tourist: oh you think your clever???
new yorker: what
tourist: i'm going to meet my dying niece and she happens to love olive garden so her whole family is going to eat with her so she'll have a few moments of happiness
new yorker: oh... oh god i'm so sor
tourist: no shut the fuck up you piece of shit. i'll find it myself
the tourist drives off and the new yorker is left to think about his life choices and his decision to be a giant condescending asshole
2008: wow i was so stupid last year
2009: wow i was so stupid last year
2010: wow i was so stupid last year
2011: wow i was so stupid last year
societydefinedbeauty: when you leave your three year old brother in your room with your mac.
awkwardly in an elevator with 8 strangers
me: i bet you're wondering why i've gathered you all here today, hello
the-absolute-funniest-posts: me: i’m so lonely omg i just want someone to talk at me someone: hey me: no not you Follow this blog, you’ll love it on your dashboard!